Ego

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           One of my greatest pet peeves is when someone is angry with me, but is “pretending not to be,” so that it becomes a passive-aggressive game.

            I would much prefer to be confronted. You can injure my pride and hurt my feelings and squish my ego… but at least I know what the problem is.

            Also, I tend to handle challenges head-on. Many times, the only way through the dark is right, straight through it. Tell me I’m being bull-headed. Tell me I’m being condescending. Tell me whatever it is that is boiling your blood – because it will do us both a favor!

            You will feel better after you get it off your chest.

            And I will be able to take that information to either accept it or ignore it – but at least I will be aware of how I am affecting those around me – and I can try harder to be less of a pain in the ass.

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            Unfortunately…

            Here I am, in passive-aggressive land AND I am really good at this game. I can passively aggravate with the best of them and my stubborn nature will prolong this madness into oblivion.

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Dear Self,

            Take a giant step back. Take a breath. Let it GO. Winning this passive-aggressive war is not worth the other losses at stake.

                        Love,
                             Me.

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BUT SELF!

            How do I do that? How do I ignore the fact that I can FEEL the angry boil-bubbles being jetted in my direction from underneath a plastic smile?

                        Sincerely,
                                   Me.

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Self,

            You expressed your concerns with real words, you apologized for as much of the problem as you are aware of, you asked for feedback. There really isn’t much else you can do without a response. The ball isn’t in your court anymore.

                        Love,
                            Me.

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BUT SELF!

            I want everyone to fight by my rules! After all, isn’t it ALL ABOUT ME?!

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*sigh*

One can only control the actions and reactions of their own selves. May I find a bit of grace and patience in my day today, and do my best to not sabotage myself – or others.

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